How to Talk to Your Kids about Adoption

Think about your life story. Where you were born, your childhood, the friends and family who were there along your journey. It’s probably a story that you’re quite familiar with. You know the ins and outs and you’ve told it in varying degrees of detail many times throughout your life. But what if your life story was something of a mystery? What if the same family wasn’t always there; the caregivers changed and the homes were never the same and friends came and went as you moved or changed schools — or even moved to a whole new country.

Everyone’s life story is unique in some way and each story is valuable. Helping kids learn, understand, and talk about their life story and adoption is an important part of being an adoptive parent.

We know that a lot of people have questions about adoption – adults and children alike. And we know that kids get asked these questions; other kids are asking, or teachers, family friends, or even strangers. So, how do you help prepare your child?

The Adoption Magazine blog has a great post about this topic. We also have a tip sheet about this topic: Empowering Your Children to Share their Adoption Story.

Depending on the age of your child or children, you can use books or even movies to help talk about adoption. We have tip sheets about Adoption Focused Books and Adoption in the Media that you might find helpful. And you can also refer to the posts at the Adoption at the Movies blog.

For even more help and advice – for both parents and children – we are hosting a W.I.S.E. Up! the World about Adoption one-day conference in Madison, Wisconsin on Saturday, April 13. While parents participate in a workshop that gives them an in-depth look at what children understand, think, and feel about adoption as they grow, children will learn the W.I.S.E. Up! tool and how that tool can empower them to handle questions and comments about adoption.

How have you tackled the topic of adoption in your family and with your children? Please share your stories, thoughts, and experiences in the comments and feel free to link up other blog posts about this topic there, as well.

 

A Place in My Heart Conference: Finding Your Life Vest in the Storm

The life experiences that your children have faced before coming into your care leave profound and lasting effects. Even after leaving a negative, painful or traumatic environment, the consequences can ripple through your home and your family on a daily basis. This workshop will examine your child’s past and what, if any, emotional and behavioral problems they may have inherited. Dr. Delaney will  offer you concrete tools to use in understanding and healing your child. His perspective will help you attack these negative behaviors from multiple angles.

Dr. Rick Delaney is a nationally known speaker and consultant to foster, kinship and adoptive parents. He is a consultant to Casey Family Programs and other foster care and adoption agencies. Dr. Delaney is the author of several books in the area of foster care and adoption, including Fostering Changes: Myth, Meaning and Magic Bullets in Attachment Theory and A 3-D View of Foster, Kinship and Adopted Children (co-authored by James Kagan, M.D.). He has helped to develop the SRDI (SAFY Risk of Disruption Inventory), an instrument that identifies foster children’s risk of disruption. He is the principle investigator of Foster Parent College, an online resource for foster and adoptive parents, and has helped to develop an online training series for Portland State University’s adoption-competent mental health certificate program. Dr. Delaney is a father and step-father and lives in Colorado and Texas.

 

 

 

Saturday, November 3, 2012

9am–4pm

Glacier Canyon Lodge at the Wilderness, Hwy 12 & Hillman Road, Wisconsin Dells, WI

REGISTRATION

Cost: $45 per person/$80 per twosome          $50 for professional

Registration Deadline: October 12, 2012

Register online at http://aplaceinmyheart2012.eventbrite.com Or call 414-475-1246 for more information

Hotel Accommodations:

Glacier Canyon Lodge at the Wilderness, HWY 12 & Hillman Road, Wisconsin Dells

A block of rooms has been reserved. Please call 1-800-867-WILD (9453) to make your reservations. Ask for block #307256 for Adoption Resources of Wisconsin at Glacier Canyon Lodge.

$99 for Double Queen with Sleeper couch at Glacier Canyon Lodge, $139 for 2 bedroom Deluxe Condo 

Please note: the above rates are for Friday, November 2. A limited number of rooms can be extended for the same rate on Saturday, November 3.

This event is sponsored by Adoption Resources of Wisconsin, Jockey Being Family, Catholic Charities – Madison, Catholic Charities – LaCrosse, Family Servcies and the Department of Children and Families.

W.I.S.E. Up! the World about Adoption Conference

Join us in Eau Claire on September 22 for the W.I.S.E. Up! the World about Adoption Conference. This is an extraordinary conference for parents and children alike and will teach you both some valuable tools and tips about sharing your adoption story.

Parents will participate in a workshop that will proved an in-depth understanding of what children comprehend, think and feel about adoption as they grow. The common questions, fears and concerns adopted children face will be addressed.  We will also explore the dynamic between non-adopted peers, extended family, and even strangers.

This program has spread across the country as children have embraced its simplicity and power to address the consistent challenge of explaining adoption and their adoption stories to peers, neighbors and even strangers. W.I.S.E. UP!® is a tool to empower children to handle questions and comments about adoption from others. This program helps children realize that they are not alone with this task. Children will learn the program, create Powerstix and role play various scenarios.

Register online at http://wiseup2012-eorg.eventbrite.com/